Sunday 21 April 2013

I don't understand


Please don't tell me off if you don't agree or I've said something wrong or expressed myself badly: I'm genuinely interested and just going on personal experience.

Since we found out that my niece is gay I've been talking to people inside the family and out. So far it seems to be that, in general, of those who have found it hard to accept, straight men are more anti-gay than straight women.

The women have tended to express thoughts like life will be harder for gay people but as long as they are happy it doesn't matter or, as one granny put it, 'it takes all sorts to make a trifle.' The men said things like no one chooses to be gay, we still love them but it's just unnatural.

What I don't understand is why? Why do the men (I know) seem to feel so strongly while the women are much more accepting? What is about – and this is my personal view here of a cause – the roles that society pushes people into and the beliefs that go with them, that make it so much more difficult for men?

I was surprised by the amount of negativity towards gay people from men (I was really naive in thinking things had got better) when it was much more accepted by women. This is, of course, a generalisation and there were lots of exceptions either way, but it was noticeable and I don't understand it.

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